Making up for lost time

Looks like all the trouble I went throughout my life to avoid issues that are a part of growth and maturity….All the years of a life without regard to those processes….I guess if you are lucky enough to survive that…You can be assured your time will come again to confront those very issues. No matter how far I’ve gone out of my way to avoid the
mundane I was only putting it aside for another time. Maybe some stuff is mandatory period. Like the demands being made of me by people who believe they can tell me how to live my life. It’s the same response I have to the ads for a new place. No this , no that, no drama, no cats, etc.They only want to rent to clones that have no internal integrity and will obey the commands of the land LORD. Not to mention how totally absurd the rents they are demanding as if everyone who needed a place to live could even come close to what they’re asking.
It would be one thing if it were a majority of ads but it’s not. It is all of them and they all consistently discriminate against government assistance like section 8 , for example.. the only places that will accept it and will allow pets are two senior citizen apartment complex’s. One in Oxnard and the other in Santa Paula and only Santa Paula has a vacancy. I t sounds like a good deal actually. the rents area very reasonable in today’s market and they have all the amenities for convenience but it’s 20 miles away.
I’m beginning to see how I’ve created or manifested this whole scenario of inevitable doom. My capacity for resistance is beyond anything remotely rational. So it matches the degree of the opposition.
I actually ask my sister for help! That was a clear calling of “Uncle” if you ask me. I had to bypass my false pride to even go there. So when I got an emil from my friend that said it was okay I realized what this whole thing is about.
It’s not that each time gets harder it’s because everything must balance. So what seems bigger and bigger is really just an indication of its opposite

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